Fly, Wild Swans: My Mother, Myself and China by Jung Chang

genre: memoir

I read Wild Swans nearly 20 years ago now.  I probably wouldn't have ever picked it up if not for my book group that chose it and it ended up being one of the most memorable reads from that part of my life.  When I was at the library and saw that the author wrote a follow-up book, I immediately grabbed it.  I think you can still appreciate this if you haven't read Wild Swans already but it would be preferable if you had.  What I appreciated most about this is her journey to publication of the book and what happened right after.  By the time I read it, it had been out for several years already so I didn't have the context that I have now gained from this book.

I did like Wild Swans a bit better.  This is told in a more vignette style with more jumping back and forth in time that made it a bit more complicated to keep things straight.  It's also, obviously, a lot more about her personal life, as well as all her interactions with all KINDS of people.  Jung's circle of contacts within this book is astonishing, especially as she writes her book about Mao.  I kept being amazed by how at-the-forefront Jung is as she negotiates trying to live outside China but still be a researcher and author as well as active participant in her mother's life IN China.  No easy feat!  

I honor her courage to put her family's story out into the world and while it is so sad at times, I know that my worldview is expanded by reading her words.

Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke (audiobook)

genre: fiction

Natalie Heller Mills wasn't always an influencer.  She was once just a person like you and me, going to college, trying to find her place.  What made her notable, though, is that Natalie's kind of Christianity meant that finding her place meant a fervent desire for  a "traditional" household with a man at the head and dozens of children and a woman with no desires of her own.  The problem is that Natalie DOES have desires, even if she only ever keeps them in her head.  And while the "outside" Natalie is striving toward being a perfect Tradwife, "inside" Natalie is a disaster of want and expectations.  The internet is the perfect platform for a person like Natalie.  Except, one day, she wakes up, and she is no longer in a world with the internet.  She is, somehow, truly living on a homestead in the past, complete with a fireplace for an oven and no food except what they make or grow for themselves.  How in the world could it have come to this?

This book is kind of a fever dream, I'm not gonna lie.  Natalie is essentially the WORST.  Little to no redeeming qualities in this lady.  But also, I kinda get where she's coming from.  And WOW do I get her road to being an influencer and what I enjoyed most about this book is its scathing look at the idea of Internet Influencer and its impact on our society and on the influencers themselves.  Sometimes listening to this book was DEEPLY uncomfortable.  Like watching a train wreck while sitting on the tracks.  I had to actually even stop listening once to take a break.  But I'm not sorry I powered through because even though the last 25% of this book is kind of insane, I was definitely intrigued, if not completely entertained.  And you know why I can give this book four stars instead of saying "I couldn't suspend my disbelief enough?"  Because I have read books about and watched the documentary about Ruby Franke.  What Natalie chooses in this book has been chosen by actual real people and lives ARE destroyed.

content warning: it's crude with lots of swears and if you are a super traditional Christian, it's going to push uncomfortable buttons

Go Gentle by Maria Semple

 genre: contemporary fiction

Something important to know about Adora Hazzard is that she is a philosopher.  She has taken to heart the words of the Stoics and it has led her to a life she could've never imagined.  Living in New York City, she's found a crazy kind of contentment with her living situation, her lack-of-love life and her pretty unbelievable job in the household of a crazy rich family.  When what feels like a chance meeting turns into espionage and Art World intrigue, Adora's handle on Stoicism can only help her keep it all together.  Right?

This is the author who wrote Where'd You Go, Bernadette, which I LOVED.  I started this book knowing nothing but that.  And so it caught me by surprise with how...wandering it is.  Things that seem like they will really matter end up being almost a side note ("coven," I'm looking at you.)  For a while I literally thought I'd accidentally switched books on my Kindle, I went back and checked to make sure I was still reading the same book. So there is a lot going on and things do end up fitting together but not in a super satisfying way.  All that said, though, it wasn't a NOT fun read.  Whenever I picked it up I was engaged and interested.  It just didn't land with the oomph I'd anticipated.

The Jills by Karen Parkman

 genre: mystery

Virginia's life is centered about her highly visible side hustle - she's a Jill, an NFL cheerleader for the Buffalo Bills.  If it paid enough to be a full-time job, that would be amazing.  But honestly, she's in it for both her love of dance and for the camaraderie of the other Jills.  So, when her bestie doesn't show up to practice, it's really unusual.  Jill standards are HIGH.  Soon Viriginia is more than concerned - she KNOWS something is wrong.  And she's determined to figure it out.

Okay.  There is A LOT going on here.  Stuff that is a bit hard to believe, if I'm honest.  It's a fast read, the writing isn't bad at all.  But Virginia's connections to the criminal underground just really required me to suspend my disbelief.  Virginia's home life and family relationships loom really large and are a major thread, I did actually like that.  It felt more grounded in a reality I could believe.  The mystery was twisty enough and I can imagine that if you are from Buffalo or a fan of the Bills, this might be even more fun for you.  I was entertained but can't really give it more than 3 stars.

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas , Robin Buss (Translator) (audiobook)

genre: fiction

One does not make the decision to read this book lightly. This massive doorstop of a novel looks overwhelming and, having been written in the 1840, one has to wonder if there is any way to translate the original 19th century French to modern English in such a way that one would honestly want to power through over 1300 pages.

Turns out, this book is a classic for a reason. I DID want to power through. I made the important pivot to listen to an audiobook version instead of holding it in my hands. I knew I would have more time to listen than to sit and read and I was worried about my attention waning. This was the perfect choice for me. Even listening at 1.7x it was over 44 hours. You do have to know all this in your head before you start.

We don't know the Count at the beginning because, in fact, the Count doesn't actually exist. Who DOES exist is the earnest and very-much-in-love Edmond Dantès. This young man is an excellent sailor, a trustred friend, and when we meet him, he is returning home from a voyage overseas. He is eager to reunite with his love, Mercédès, who is anxiously awaiting his return. At this time, France is in political turmoil as Napoleon is plotting to return to power and men must choose where their loyalties lie. And thus the Count's origin story begins when he is caught up in a plot laid by three jealous and power-hunger men who ensure that Dantès ends up in a prison cell for actual years. And while our young hero is in jail, his pain and grief and rage turn into a resolute desire for revenge that will not stop. When miraculous circumstances lead to Dantès transforming into the man named the Count of Monte Cristo, that optimistic and innocent young man dies and the man that is left behind sees himself as the hand of God, destined to mete out punishments and enact the justice that he feels fits the crimes committed against him.

Because it was originally a serial, the chapters are good bite-sizes and it's super readable. In between all the plot and machinations of the Count, there are some really big and deep ideas here about justice and forgiveness and what is worth living for. Evil is so blatantly evil and it feels like everywhere you look, characters are weak and focused on the all the wrong things. There are certainly a lot of plot threads that have NOT aged well, especially those concerning slavery and opioid drug use, which caught me off guard. But when you let your brain acknowledge when this was written and then just lean into the time period, there is so much going on here that it's honestly sometimes hard to keep straight. You'll have CHAPTERS AND CHAPTERS of what must surely be a completely unrelated plotline and then somehow BAM. There's the hand of the Count AGAIN. As much as I'd occasionally get bored during these interludes, I did always enjoy when things tied back in again.

By the end? While there are so many literal villains, I also found that I cared about so many of these characters. The young woman who just wants to be with who she chooses, the grandpa who wants to use his voice to help the ones he loves most, the young man who has never forgotten the stranger who helped his family. I wanted to know how their stories ended! The last couple dozen chapters are like a giant showcase showdown of WHAT IN THE WORLD?? as all of the Count's plans come to fruition - and not always in the ways he'd anticipated. I appreciated HIS growth as a character as well, learning how to be not just a friend but someone who can truly let get of his deep and heavy pain.

It's a wild ride. If you like stories with disguises, untold wealth, hidden caves and mysterious poisons, secret plots, public revelations of one's darkest secrets and the kind of love that can stand the test of time, then hear me out. Read this book.

The Other Girl by Annie Ernaux, Alison L. Strayer (translator)

genre: memoir

This book is a letter to the sibling that the author, Annie, never knew. A sister, who lived and died before Annie was born, was not someone she was able to ever have a relationship with but whose existence took up a huge invisible space in Annie’s family. Sparse and literary, Annie’s reshaping of her childhood based on this information is so resonant, this book fairly zings with Annie’s desire for place and validation. Well done.

The Blue Fox by Sjón

genre: fiction

Rare as a blue fox is, the hunter is determined to make her his. Living in the wilds of 19th century Iceland, the hunter and his community scrape away at a harsh life and the skin of the vixen he hunts is highly valuable. But in this short novel, the idea of “value” is explored when a naturalist living off the land shows how he has cared for a woman he invited into his life.

I read this book without even reading the description, only knowing that it had won the Nordic Council Literature Prize, and that it would probably be depressing. I was not wrong, it is both dark and upsetting. But also, the naturalist is such an example of a compassionate heart that I can’t say that the dark overcame the light in this instance. I finished it feeling like one person can actually make a real difference in someone’s life.

I do want to give a content warning that one of the characters in this book has Down Syndrome and it is really hard to read about how the world of 1866 viewed folks who are (and this is actually a quote from the book) “made according to a different recipe from the rest of us.” The book redeems itself, in my opinion, with how it ends but it still won’t be a good choice for all readers.

Two Lives of Charlemagne by Einhard and Notker the Stammerer

 genre: history

This book is two different volumes written in the 800s about Charlemagne.  The volume by Einhard is a more factual account of Charlemagne's life and experiences, especially important because Einhard was a contemporary and friend of the king, so he did have an eye on Charlemagne's inner world.  Notker's volume is mostly full of anecdotes that even my brain had a hard time believing.  Luckily, the scholarly introduction to the book even tells us that most of this stuff is made up. HOWEVER, even knowing it's made up, you DO get a pretty good idea of what life was like over 1100 years ago.  The church was so vitally important.  Red heads were feared.  God and the universe always punished bad people in horrible ways (like a church bell falling on you and squishing you flat).  Women were viewed as property but also, sometimes had a brain.  This is a direct quote, translated from the Latin, by Notker the Stammerer, "It is the way of all women to want their own particular plan and solution to take preference over the decisions made by their menfolk."  HELL YEAH, ha ha.

I do like that this book gives you an idea of Charlemagne as a person AND as the giant he became in the minds of future generations.  He really was just a dude who was good with a sword and loved learning.  THAT is a good thing to know.  Also, this made me laugh.  This was by Einhard, who would know, "Even then (Charlemagne) continued to do exactly as he wished, instead of following the advice of his doctors, whom he came positively to dislike after they advised him to stop eating the roast meat to which he was accustomed and to live on stewed dishes."     It tracks that the Holy Roman Emperor would ignore his doctors if they told him to eat healthy. I just love that Einhard felt like this needed to be written down in this document that he was intentionally writing for posterity.  

I feel like unless you are interested in the subject or in period literature in general, you should just not read this. 

More Than Enough by Anna Quindlen

genre: contemporary fiction

On the outside, Polly's life might look pretty dreamy.  She's got an amazing husband and a good job teaching literature at a private high school.  She has good friends and a community that cares about her.  But, and we know this, just because someone's life looks dreamy doesn't mean they aren't grieving and in this case, Polly is carrying some heavy grief.  Not only is IVF not working and childlessness is like a dark cloud but Polly's dad is slowly declining in a heartbreaking unawareness.  Her book club, the three friends that have walked through it all with her, are the rock she stands on, so when she does a DNA test that has surprising results, she knows where to turn.

This is a fast and rather lovely story of yearning and loss and finding a way to be at peace with what life throws at you.  Polly's relationship with her mom was an interesting thread, as was the DNA test and the book club friends.  It just didn't make me work too hard and there are a lot of likable characters plus the writing never annoyed me.  Maybe her husband is too perfect to be true but I kinda loved him so good for her.  Four stars for how often I was happy to pick it up.

Roots of Hope: a Memoir by A.V. Neidermyer

genre: memoir

I have really found myself drawn to women's stories lately - not stories ABOUT women but the real stories that women write about their own lives.  I know I lean towards historical diaries and autobiographies, as I like to imagine what my life might have been like centuries or even decades ago.  But when I saw this memoir of a women who is essentially my age, sharing her story of both abuse and hope, I knew I wanted to give this book a try.

I honor what the author has overcome.  I want to hug that young girl and take care of her the way she deserved.  It's almost more than one can bear, as a reader, to understand how horrifically the author was treated by those she had the right to count on for both love and care.  Her home life, her path through mental health care and the power of her own conviction and resilience made this a fast and engaging book. I felt so grateful for those who DID see her and watch out for her, even if it felt like there were crowds of people purposely always looking the other way.

The fact that she came out the other side as such a grounded and loving human being is a testament to the power of the human spirit.

If you also appreciate stories of triumph over unthinkable odds, I truly recommend Roots of Hope.